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0.5K: The Ultimate Underachievers “Run”

  • Three Wisemen
    7323 E Shoeman Ln Scottsdale, AZ
  • Date: April 25, 2020
  • Time: 11:30 AM to 6:00 PM
  • Price: $42.05 – Early Bird Pricing, $49.05 – General Registration, $82.05 - VIP

Registration is officially open for our fourth ever 0.5K: The Ultimate Underachievers “Run!” Check-in will be from 11:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. at Three Wisemen and we’ll keep the party going until 5 p.m. at Boondocks Patio & Grill!!


- FOUR FREE DRINKS (1 beer, 2 shots, 1 glass of champagne)
- An awesome souvenir T-shirt
- A sweatband to help you through your 1,600 foot “run”
- Free slice of pizza to help you carboload for the “run”
- Free donut & champagne as you celebrate crossing the finish
- Amazing racing “bib” so we can still remember you when
looking through pictures the next day. “Hey Jim, #271 was so
much fun!”
- A pretentious oval Euro-style 0.5K sticker that you can attach
to your rear windshield to show everyone what a badass you
- A donation to Child Crisis Arizona

We know what you underachievers are thinking. Do I really HAVE to run? How FAR is a 0.5K?
We like to think of it as you can run, but the rest of us may point and laugh a little bit as we’re enjoying our pizza. And a 0.5K = 0.3 miles = 1,640.42 feet = 19,685 inches. We have faith that every one of you can make it!


Saturday, April 25th, 2020 at 11:30am


- $42.05 – Early Bird Pricing (Includes everything listed above).
Good through March 24 or when sold out.
- $49.05 – General Registration with Souvenir T-shirt. Good
through April 7 or when sold out.
- $49.05 – General Registration without Souvenir T-shirt. Good
through April 23 or when sold out.

This event will sell out; therefore, we will not have on-site registration for this event. You must be registered in advance.


Obviously, we have to have prizes to spice things up!

- The Best Dressed Group will receive a prize package from PHX
- The group that is the Most Fun // Loudest // Life of the Party
will receive a prize package from Three Wisemen!
- The Biggest Underachievers will receive a prize package from


Feeling super lazy? We’re offering an Ultra Underachiever VIP Package to everyone!
Get everything above, plus:

- Skip the line pass at Check-in
- Extra slice of pizza for the “run”
- Golf cart ride for the 0.5K to help save your legs during the
- Gatorade on the golf cart to replenish those electrolytes
- A gold star! Seriously, who hasn’t missed getting gold stars?

Additional $40.00 – 100% of proceeds go directly to Child Crisis Arizona


- We’ll have 2 photographers on-site to document the run, so
you don’t have to!
- “Shotgun” start! **We’re popping a bunch of balloons, guys.
Calm down!**
- The finish line you’ve always dreamed of crossing. Because it’s
at a bar with champagne, donuts, and a professional
photographer to document it all!
- Medical “tent” along the way. **it may just be a TV tray with
barbie band-aids, but we think it will cover everything